Imprint Read online

  “Yeah, well, I don’t appreciate being interrogated,” Drew growled.

  “I was asking about your wellbeing out of concern. Sorry if that’s a crime.”

  “And since when did you start caring about what goes on in my life?”

  “Since you changed,” Hayden seethed, his voice rising in anger.

  Their mother, who had long since given up on any pretences of normalcy, sighed. “Stop it.” There was a stern, authoritative tone in her voice which she rarely used. “Hayden – can you please explain what you meant?”

  Hayden hesitated for a moment, floundering for words. “I’m not really sure,” he finally muttered. “You’re just different, Sean. Happier maybe, more outgoing and less sarcastic all the time. Its small things, like how you wanted to go to the beach of all places. You hate the beach. I tried to ignore it at first, but everything about you just feels wrong. It’s as if…you’re not even you anymore, but I know that doesn’t make any sense.”

  ‘Trust me, it makes more sense than you realise,’ Sean thought to himself, stunned that Hayden was this close to working it out himself. He could clearly see the concealed fear on Drew’s face, threatening to pool into his eyes. “You’re right,” Drew snapped. “That doesn’t make any sense. Now stop analysing my every move, as if I’m some test subject in one of your psychology experiments.”

  There was a stalemate for a moment, as both boys glared at each other and their mother tried in vain to diffuse the tension. “You said that night that you trusted me,” Hayden murmured. “Just tell me the truth for once, and I’ll leave you alone.”

  Sean could almost see the distressed thoughts in Drew’s head, as he tried frantically to think up a suitable explanation for his strange behaviour. Sean himself decided to stay silent. He couldn’t decide if he wanted Hayden to find out the truth or not, but he was leaning towards not. “Okay, I’ll tell you,” Drew finally sighed in defeat. “It’s because I’m in…love. With Ali.” Now that was unexpected. But Sean had to admit, it was rather clever too.

  Hayden looked dubious, but a smile broke out on their mother’s face. She started saying something, but for some reason Sean couldn’t hear anymore. He could only see her lips move, like a TV on mute. A moment later his eyesight failed too and that familiar sense of falling from a great height returned as the world spun into a canvas of black.

  Sean weaved between the jostling bodies and crowds of students as the bell rang to signal the end of the day. He wanted to get out of here and away as quickly as possible, before someone could catch up with him. They would only find something new to torment him over. Maybe it would be his stupid haircut this time, or the food stain decorating his shirt. He really hated school.

  He had made it halfway across the concrete playground, halfway to safety, before they found him. Their smirks, the silent taunts in their eyes, as if they already knew he wouldn’t fight back against them. And they did know. Because this had happened a hundred times before, and he could never put a stop to it.

  “Oi, Lane,” idiot no.1 called out. “Or should I say, Lame.” His friends laughed. To Sean it sounded sinister and cruel, like an echo that has been distorted in too many ways. They approached him now, four on one like a predator sizing up its prey.

  “Leave me alone,” Sean tried to turn away from them, but one of them grabbed his arm. Nails dug through the thin material of his school shirt and into his flesh, probably leaving crescent shaped bruises.

  “And why should we?” Smirk. Laughter. So cold.

  “Because if you don’t, I will make you wish you had.” Sean looked up, startled, to see a pair of frighteningly dark eyes glaring at the four boys, churning with anger. And all he could feel was relief, because Drew was here now and he was taller than all four of them combined and somehow he would stop this for good.

  “Who do you think you are?” Idiot no.3 asked, but Sean could clearly hear his voice waver with fear. Hell, Drew could be terrifying when he wanted to be.

  “I think that I’m someone who is older, stronger and taller than all of you. So unless you want blue and black skin, I would suggest that you stay away from Sean. Permanently.” Drew slammed a fist into his palm for good measure. That alone seemed to be enough to cause all four to turn around and flee. And although Sean hated himself for being so weak, hated that his baby-sitter had to fight his battles for him, in that moment all he could feel was relief. And gratitude.

  “Thank you,” Sean murmured quietly on the journey back to his home.

  Drew just shrugged. “It was nothing. Your parents are paying me to look after you, I figure they should get their money worth.”

  “You still didn’t have to do that, though.”

  “Correction: I shouldn’t have had to do that. You need to stand up for yourself, Sean. You can’t let them take advantage of you like that.”

  Sean looked down in shame, knowing the truth in his words. As much he didn’t want to admit it, over the last few months he had become friends with Drew, even grown to respect the boy. He felt like he was letting Drew down somehow. In front of Drew he was always witty and sarcastic; he couldn’t help but feel embarrassed that Drew had seen him so weak and pathetic. “I know,” he whispered. “I’m working on it.”

  The older boy seemed to sense his despondent tone and his expression softened marginally. “How about I teach you some self-defence moves sometime? You know, just in case.”

  Sean forced himself to scoff, like he usually would. “Please. You don’t know any moves. You just bluff.”

  Drew raised an eyebrow mischievously. “Wanna bet?”

  “I could take you anytime.”

  “Hah. In your dreams, kid.”

  Sean shot up gasping for breath, his mind reeling. Flashes of images; four boys, dark and angry eyes, a threat, a strong feeling of shame and self-hatred. Sean didn’t understand any of the jumbled images, where they came from or what they meant. They were scraps of information that he somehow knew were caged inside him, but he couldn’t find the key to unlock them. They were fragments of a story line, shattered beyond recognition; the way ripples in water shatters a reflection. Then a face appeared above him, sharply defined. There was something familiar about the eyes. They were a deep blue, concerned…Drew.

  “Sean? What happened?”

  Sean sat up slowly, looking around. He was on the floor of his bedroom, and it looked to be early evening. Reality rushed back to him in a series of dizzying memories. “Yes I’m fine, thanks for asking,” he forced himself to snap sarcastically, although there was no conviction behind it.

  He turned just in time to see Drew roll his eyes. “You blacked out at breakfast, it was really weird. I didn’t even know Imprints could do that. What happened?” he asked again.

  Sean sighed, running a hand over his face. He couldn’t get headaches any more, but he still felt so confused. “I really have no idea,” he admitted. “Everything just went black, and the next thing I remember is waking up here.”

  “You really don’t remember anything at all?”

  “I keep seeing these images, but they’re too blurry to make out. I don’t understand what it means.”

  Drew looked similarly confused and…worried, almost. “Do you feel any different than before?”

  “No, still as numb and iridescent as always.” The images had stopped now. Sean grasped at the last dregs of foreign emotion that ran through him, trying in vain to discern their source and meaning. The silence extended, and when he finally turned back to Drew he saw a look of deep concentration on the other boy’s face. “So what does it mean, then?” he whispered hoarsely. “Am I fading out already?”

  “I don’t know,” Drew sighed in defeat. “I don’t think so. It’s not supposed to happen like this. Hell, I’ve never heard of anything like it. You really are an exception to the general rules of death.”

  Sean chuckled humourlessly. “And you’re one to the rules of life. So what, does that mean you’re my other half or something?”
/>
  “If you could put it in a way that doesn’t imply that we’re romantically involved, then maybe.”

  “Don’t worry, the thought sickens me too.” Sean sighed. “What should we do about this new development, then? I doubt it means anything good for either of us.”

  “There’s nothing we can do,” Drew shrugged. “Except wait and see if it happens again. In the meantime, I need to keep Hayden out of this. You realise it’s for the best, right?”

  And as much as Sean tried to convince himself otherwise, he agreed with Drew, nodding his consent. There was nothing Hayden, or anyone else, could do to help him now. His brother finding out the truth would only cause unnecessary complications. They grew quiet after that, Drew retreating back into his thoughts and Sean still trying to make sense of everything that he had felt and seen. As the sky outside bloomed steadily into navy blue, he felt something niggling in the back of his mind that he couldn’t place, something about concrete playgrounds and an all-encompassing sense of security.

  Days turned into a week, and a week turned into two. She was by no means fixed, but Ali seemed to be improving little by little. She’d gotten more used to eating around Drew and he no longer had to threaten her into it anymore. Sean kept to his routine of spending half the night with her, and the other half with Drew. Either way he could not sleep himself, and watching others do it was the next best thing. He missed being able to sleep; the nights were long and lonely, filled with flickering dark shadows and strange noises. He missed being able to eat as well, being able to take a shower and feel the hot water on his back. Once, he had just stood in the shower and let the water stream straight through him, feeling oddly empty. He felt less alive each day, less human. It made him wonder how long it would take him to fade out of existence completely, and somehow he knew that he didn’t have very long left. Whatever he had become, it would be gone soon.

  He’d lost track of the date by now. Time was another thing that had become insignificant. All he knew was that it was an unusually dark night and he was walking back to his own house when he saw Brian and Penny again, the Imprints who Drew was friends with. It had been a while since he’d last seen them.

  “Sean,” The older man stopped him first and nodded his head in greeting, the little girl offering a shy smile. “How are you finding it?”

  The casualness of the situation momentarily surprised Sean, as he still barely knew the other two and hadn’t expected them to suddenly act so…friendly, asking how he was and everything. As if they were old friends and had known each other for years. “Finding what?” he remembered to ask, feeling rather stupid.

  “The afterlife, of course.”

  Sean shrugged, cracking a joke to try and lighten the atmosphere. “Definitely not how they described it in the Bible.”

  “It’s just a form of purgatory really,” Brian gave a rather fake laugh. “You get used to it after awhile.”

  “Sure, and then you go crazy like most of the others.”

  “Well, it depends if you’re mentally strong enough to handle it or not.” Sean was beginning to sense an imminent lecture. “Most people aren’t really, it eventually gets too much and they start to lose touch with reality, but I’ve known a few who have been able to pull through.”

  “Like who?”

  “You!” Penny piped up, bubbly and smiley like little girls her age were supposed to be. She wasn’t that different from them, really. “And Drew. And grandpa and me.”

  “It’s hard, being who we are,” Brian said. “But it helps to have people to rely on.”

  “Pff,” Sean scoffed, irritation managing to creep into his voice despite how awkward he felt. “I can barely call Drew someone to rely on. We fight constantly, and dammit he stole my body. I have a right to be pissed.”

  Penny boldly sent him a disapproving frown. “You shouldn’t say bad words.”

  “Being angry won’t change anything,” Brian added. “You’d be better off spending your energy on trying to find a way back.”

  “I’m not sure it’s even possible anymore,” Sean frowned slightly, but stated the facts with little emotion. He had no emotion to mask anymore; he had resigned himself to one day fading out a while ago. It no longer bothered him. “I can feel myself getting weaker each day. I don’t have much longer, probably only a few weeks at the most.”

  There was a flash of some foreign emotion – surprise, maybe? Sadness? Pain? – in the man’s blue eyes for a second, but it was enough for Sean to know that it didn’t belong there. “How?” he muttered quietly to himself. “How can you fade so soon? Your body’s still alive, you should still have plenty of life energy left, this is wrong…”

  Sean shifted his feet guiltily. He had a good feeling what was taking up all of this ‘life energy’ that was supposedly keeping him existing; his various attempts to make parts of himself solid. It was the only plausible explanation he could think of. Drew had warned him. “Don’t worry about it, old man. I’m fine with it. It’s not like I have anything here I need to stick around for.”

  Brian shook his head. “What about Ali? Hayden? Your mother?”

  “They don’t need me. They need Drew, now.”

  “You don’t honestly believe that.”

  “Yeah, I really do.”

  “So you’re just going to give up?”

  “Pretty much.”

  In a moment Brian had crossed the distance between them, raised his hand, and hit him across the face. Sean, eyes wide and startled, was rooted to the ground and unable to look away from the livid blue orbs that bored into him, suddenly no longer dull and lifeless.

  “What the bloody hell was that for?” Sean ground out between clenched teeth, once he had gotten over his shock.

  Brian looked disappointed, and it was much worse than the previous fury. “Stop being so damn self-pitying, Sean, and remember. Remember whatever it is that you lived for, and keep living for it,” he said simply. Then he took a step back, his expression fading into guilt when he saw the scared look on Penny’s face and the tears brimming in her eyes. “Sorry,” he added gruffly, gesturing vaguely at Sean’s face. “I know you couldn’t feel it, but still…sorry.”

  “What right do you have to tell me those things anyway?” Sean snarled, pointedly ignoring the apology. “I don’t know who you think you are, but this is really none of your business.”

  The man had that strange look in his eyes again. “Maybe, but I’m doing this to try and help you.”

  “I don’t need help,” Sean spat. “I’m fine on my own. I’ve always been fine on my own before all you freaks started interfering in my life.”

  Penny, terrified by the shouting, was now cowering behind Brian and her eyes were wide and moist. “Stop it…” she whimpered. “Stop fighting.”

  Sean felt a wad of guilt in his throat when he caught her gaze. The anger diminished slightly and he raised his hands in surrender. “Whatever. I don’t want to stand here arguing with you all night, old man. I’m going.” He was about to walk away in the opposite direction, when he heard the hoarse voice behind him.

  “Wait.”

  “What now?”

  The man shrugged. “I doubt watching Drew sleep is really that interesting. Why don’t you come with me instead?”

  “You’re kidding, right?” Sean spun around to give him an incredulous look. “You just attacked me, and you expect me to follow you to god-knows-where at one in the morning?”

  “I did it for your own good, and I’ve already apologised. I just want to talk.”

  “Like hell. We have nothing to talk about.”

  The man’s face cracked into an odd smile. “Sure we do. You can tell me about yourself, about your life, everything.”

  “Why should I?”

  “Because I’m curious. And bored.”

  Sean shook his head in exasperation, silently mulling over his options. Conversation was definitely more appealing, even with someone he currently had a strong dislike for. A part of him knew th
at Brian had been reasonable to hit him, and he deserved it. He couldn’t blame the man, really, for knocking sense into him. “Fine,” he agreed hesitantly. It was not like Brian even could hurt him if he wanted to. He really had nothing to lose. “Just until the sun rises, though. Then I have to go back.”

  The older man nodded. “I know a nice place to rest, follow me.” Holding onto Penny’s small hand, the two Imprints began to walk slowly down the street. Not knowing what else to do, Sean followed.

  It took about twenty minutes, but the three of them eventually came to a large, green clearing. The small field, somehow hidden among all of the urban development, was like an escape from reality. It lay on top of a mini plateau and, on one side, provided a breathtaking view of the city lights blinking in the night. Like fireflies. Sean could almost imagine a hundred of them filling up the air and illuminating the dark sky with their soft glows. Brian led him over to a large oak tree, the one with the best view, and they both sat down beneath it. Penny seemed to be entranced with idea of just being there and spun in circles giddily, giggling and trying to crane her neck up to see the stars above.

  “It’s pretty nice out here, isn’t it?” Brian murmured quietly. “I used to come here all the time when I was alive. I still do, and Penny loves it, but it’s different. After you die, you begin to view the world differently.”

  Sean nodded in understanding. “I know,” he provided, leaning back and tipping his head upwards. “It kind of makes you realise that you always took everything for granted, and you only realise that after it’s too late.”

  “That’s the point of it,” Brian said. “Drew said something like that to me as well when I first met him. But then he added that it was something he wanted to change.”

  “Well, he managed it. I’m the evidence.”

  Brian smiled sadly. “Do you really think its called living, though, if it’s only in the place of someone else?”

  Somewhere in the city, a few lights went out and it seemed to make a drastic difference to the overall view. Penny, her hair a silver tint, had giving up twirling and lay in the grass instead, muttering quietly to herself. Sean stared at her dark form for a moment, before answering. “No, I guess not.”